Scarlet experiences

I feel I can't leave Russian as the only one to have written more than a few words on her experiences.

I have such a poor memory for the wonderful things that are said to me. However I will try my best to remember the classics.
Here we go:

At the tender age of 17 having been dragged from a club halfway over the island to a random cliff carpark, I was asked by a rather blinged up 30 something with a strong accent.
"have you ever slept with a Jamaican?"
To this day I have slept with no Jamaicans. The friend that dragged me there, and was getting up to no good in some bushes is now happily married with a bun in the oven.

More recently last Christmas I was asked by a girl I consider one of my best friends:
"I want to get (her boyfriend) something he's always wanted for Christmas"
Ok, I'm thinking and how does this involve me? She continues:
"and you're the only girl I would let him be with"
Hold up! What! She wasn't asking what I thought she was, was she?
"NO!" I yelped
To which she said:
"but you don't even have to sleep with him,"
"NO!"
"we'll get you really drunk first"
At which point I ran away to play darts.

At the moment I currently embarrassing myself around a rather dishy tall lifeguard.
He seduced me with
"would you like a pack of crisps?"
"yes" I replied
"well you'll have to kiss me first"
I got the crisps.